journal

welcome to my journal! :)

2026-06-19 - i am huuuge bachelor

IM CRAZY!!!! blehhhh im so crazy!!!!!! im pyscho!!! im weird!!! im super lgbtq!! and i am drinking kombucha again (apple this time). i cannot help but feel that this summer will be a famous one in my mind forever. i feel like i am in the "things are going well" montage in a rom-com, which is so scary, because it implies the impending moment where it all comes crashing down around me. i need to soak it in as much as possible. i need to vlog every day or something. god. it's all so fucked. and i am saying that with the biggest grin on my face. JEEZ!!! oh man. okay. yeah. okay. that is all for now. hope you all enjoyed... my devoted fans and followers out there...

2026-06-04 - SUMMER

ohhhhhhhhhhhh neocities journal... summer is in the air... i am drinking kombucha in a bottle with a straw and my hair is air drying from the shower and my window is open and my fan is on and OHHHHHHHHHH it's really all starting to feel like summer. it's crazy how having a clean room makes you feel like a person... who would have guessed?! things have been FUUUCCKED up crazy but also like. awesome and chill! my life has done a massive flip since february and it makes so much sense while also making none at all. what is going on!!! but i know what's going on!!! it's what i've dreamt of for years!!! but of course dreams don't work out all of the kinks for you... making it all work is a whole other story... but in short things are good and i'm good and hopeful and so so grateful and surrounded by a crazy amount of love!!!!!! thanks for reading this if you did. i need to go eat lunch or something. goodbye!!!!!!!!!!! :)

2026-05-25 - (one text message)

ohhhh journal... that decision was a bit more life altering than i expected! lowkey a text message became about a hundred text messages at least 20 phone calls and now a plane ticket (in my head i said this like heath ledger in 10 things i hate about you). i am not as depressed as i was in february but GOD april was rough. so much fun but so busy and so brutal AUGUHHGHGH i went insane. but now i'm better! at least by a little! and i cleaned my whole room! for ummm no reason no one will be staying in it aaand no text messages resulted in anything crazy and oh my god OH MY GOD oh my goddd anyway! i just had my dinner (11pm?) and some sleepytime tea (appropriate timing). i'm on facetime with max talking about work and we're acting like tomorrow isn't going to flip the world upside down. i need to do laundry and go to sleep so i can wake up early and remember all of the things i forgot to do today. i wrote in my notes a while ago (when i thought days like tomorrow were impossible) "i hope things go how my heart is begging them to". now i think that they really might. but! first sleep!!! goodbye little journal... i hope someone out there reads this :) goodnight zzzzzzzzz

2026-02-24 - im eating a pickle (multiple pickle)

HI JOURNAL!!! im less sad this update. im insane and depressed and making massive life altering decisions (one text message) but im being super chill about it. im eating mini pickles that i bought because a cool girl in a hi-vis vest at walmart said "those are literally the best pickles. i have a jar in my basket already if you don't believe me." but i did believe her so i bought them! i want to update here more often but i gotta get my life together and have free time again. i'm supposed to be cleaning right now so obviously my brain is gonna find literally anything else to do... hence... web journal update... but i must go!!!!!! goodbye devoted web journal followers!

2026-02-18 - it's been a minute!!

hello journal... i haven't been updating this or working on my website much 1. because i went on a trip 2. because i have a job and was busy but also 3. my grandma passed a week ago. i don't really plan on using this journal as somewhere to vent, but i don't really know where to put this feeling right now. she is the reason i am who i am today. it feels very heavy tonight and i don't doubt that i will always feel that weight. just needed to put that somewhere. here is a very blurry and unflattering photo of her from a camera i found in my grandpa's office/my old bedroom because it's the only photo i can find.

2026-02-3 - HOLY SHIT

I DID IT!!!!!!!! shoutout cori and w3schools.com... this world is beautiful and now my journal is on cute little pieces of paper. yay!!!!! and im eating pad thai. life cant get better

2026-02-03 - my second entry!! (this shit is hard)

hello journal!! this is lowkey unreadable right now because i cannot figure out how to make textboxes for the life of me. its ok its called learning yayyy also i forgot to add the date on the last one so lowkey idk when i wrote it LOL thatsok. back to trying to make a textbox... thanks for reading!!!! !:D

2026-01-?? - my first entry

hello!! i am still figuring out how all of this works... i think it will take a lot of practice... but this is all so cool and exciting!! however it is 5 am so i may need to throw in the towel for tonight... thanks for reading!